'GOOD SENSE'

      Feedback on a blog is a 'sometime thing'.  A few comments to the most recent  . . . "Nonsense" . . . were posted on the site and I  also received several emails.  These responses indicated a resonance with my expressed sentiments.  I believe that many of you would have your  own additions for the 'nonsense' list.

    Further reflections yielded nominees for a different kind of list: 'Good sense'.  In the cultural milieu in which I grew up, if something made 'good sense', it was close to 'wisdom'. Life is much too complex to attempt encapsulating into a few maxims.  Rather than a 'destination', I offer some  'signposts' for the journey.

     To Ask for Help when we cannot do something by and for ourselves is not  an indication of Weakness but of Intelligence.

Rather counter-cultural, isn't it,  with all the bravado about 'pull your own red wagon'; 'paddle your own canoe', etc., that abounds in our world.  As I stressed in the last  post, 'self reliance' is hardly 'self sufficiency', the latter never fully possible.  There simply are some things we can not do for ourselves and to attempt such would be worse than folly.  Maybe you know the saying, 'He who has himself for a doctor has a fool for a physician; He who has himself for a lawyer has a fool for an attorney; He who has himself as a therapist has a fool for a counselor.' And on it goes and it is not gender specific.  It is good to have the expertise that one's occupation can provide but 'two heads are better than one' is often wisdom.

    You Can't Sell from an Empty Wagon.

Peddlers who sell their wares throughout the isolated countryside are pretty much extinct.  In my youth, I knew a man who enclosed a flatbed truck and called it his 'Rolling Store', selling everything from washtubs to sewing thread to food items.  Luther, however, did not have an inexhaustible inventory and periodically had to return to his 'warehouse' for replenishment.  Similarly, attempting to meet the demands and rigors of life without physical, emotional, and spiritual replenishment means we 'run on fumes', increasing the likelihood of exhaustion.

    Old Dogs Can Learn New Tricks.

Certainly runs counter to the old  saw about the non-receptivity of old dogs to new information and processes.  In its stead, I believe an 'old dog' can learn something new if two circumstances hold true: i) the 'old dog' has mental acuity
and ii) he/she wants to learn the new trick.  I.e., motivation.
That old people are 'set in their way' is a stereotype that while numerous examples abound is hardly universal.

   Put your oxygen mask on first.

I sometime call this the 'Lesson from the Flight Attendant' . . .
"In the unlikely event of a loss of cabin air pressure, an oxygen mask will fall from an overhead compartment. . ."  When asked,  "When traveling with a child or a person who cannot put on their mask, whose mask do you put on first?", 
perhaps a slight majority correctly choose the counter-intutitive answer: my own.  This is altogether different from a narcissistic self-centeredness.  Unless a person is 'sucking oxygen', they run an heightened likelihood of causing injury to themselves and the one(s) needing assistance.

   The World Doesn't Revolve Around You, Son . . .

My dad was hardly a cruel man, trying to damage his son's 'self-esteem'.   To the contrary, I recall many instances of his fostering a sense of worth for my brothers and me.  His message was intended as a preventative for any notion of privilege or entitlement that might encroach.  Dad had no tolerance for the self-centeredness portrayed in the notion of 'looking out for Number One'.  While I never recall his quoting For Whom the Bell Tolls : 'send not to ask for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee', he communicated an equalitarian valuing of people because we are all in life together.

     I think it was St. Paul who admonished that 'we not think more highly of ourselves than we ought'.  I have noticed that quite often this gets lived out as self-denigration.  Do you remember the slogan, LSMFT, once used by a tobacco company?  In human terms, that can be short-hand for Low Self-Esteem Means Friction and Trouble in interpersonal relationships.  Having a balanced, healthy sense of oneself within the context of human relationships seems to be a thread running throughout this 'good sense' list.

      Satchel