Saturday, August 24, 2024

Gus

 




                                                             "THAT'S   MY  DAD"


      By now you have probably seen the picture. And, likely are aware  of the mockery that has erupted on social media in response to Gus Walz's expression of  love for his dad.

    One's political affiliation or opinions melt into irrelevance in the face of derision and bullying.  As it happened, he was responding to his father's address at the recent Democratic National Convention.

And, while we later learned that he is "neurodivergent" with special needs, such ought not to have mattered. (According to Wikipedia,  neurodivergent refers to "the unique way that each person's brain develops.  That means it's not preventable, treatable or curable.")  The Rev. John Pavlovitz wrote that Gus Walz's conditions shouldn't matter and that"the mistreatment and bullying he has faced should still be  disgusting and unacceptable to decent people." Furthermoore, he wrote, "it should illicit outrage in human beings of empathy and intelligence." ( Gus Walz is America's Son . . .in The Beautiful Mess, August 23, 2024)

   The 17 year old was showing what real love  looks like. Maybe it's past time to display this kind of warmth and vulnerability, individually and as a nation.

   The worn-out adage that "big boys don't cry" continues to wreak havoc in the emotional well-being of males of all ages.   Toxic masculinity  is one manifestation.  Taboos against tenderness and vulnerability cost many their full range of being human.  As a psychotherapist, I see many of my male clients bravely seeking for healthy ways to be men without the bravado and chauvinism that has stiffled us for so long.  "John Wayne is dead. We need new models for male-ness in the 21st century" is a favorite invitation I use.

    A personal friend reflecting on the special needs of his grand-son said it well and succinctly: "Loving  kindness and  compassion  are what those with special needs desire and deserve."  I believe his observations could be extended to everyone.

     Satchel



8 comments:

  1. Thanks for this, Ron. T. Parham

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  2. Ron,

    I have no problem with what you've posted. On an individual level, we must meet people where they are, with compassion. Christ commanded no less.

    However, with the international situation the way it is, we would be better served by a military patterned after John Wayne. In order to meet challenges thrown into our face by China, Iran, North Korea, etc. (none of whom are obsessed with DEI), that is what is going to be required for us to survive. We already have a hollowed out military, hardware-wise. I dare say that, personnel-wise, we are headed down the same path.

    Mike W.

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  3. Thank you Ron for once again articulating what I wish that I could put into words. However, I am surprised at a fellow reader's opinion about the state of our military and its readiness on the world stage. Is he really suggesting that the tenets of DEI are some how gutting the armed forces? Rather I respectfully suggest they are stronger for it!

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  4. Not certain who Les was "here hereing," but I didn't hear anything in Ron's thoughts that implied this is an either/or world. For that matter, I suppose it is also a matter of what one thinks having John Wayne's personality means.

    The movie "A Few Good Men" features Jack Nicholson's Col. Jessep who makes the case that the world is a tough dangerous place and tough dangerous men ... including women ... are needed to defend us. True enough! But do we really want the Col. Jesseps of the world teaching our children to be copies of who he is?

    I loved John Wayne ... as a movie character. I loved George Patton ... as an Army field commander. But as an example for men, not so much.

    Part of the problem is we breath into these iconic figures traits they never possessed.

    When Lincoln was visiting the then-conquered Richmond near the end of the war, a general with him asked what he should do with the Southerners now at their mercy. Lincoln's response was, "If I were in your place I’d let’em up easy, let’em up easy.” I feel Lincoln was a man of strength, yet his comment showed he was also a man of compassion. The one-dimensional John Wayne silver-screen image is a poor substitute for a real-world man such as Lincoln.

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  5. Well said. Thank you.

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  6. I can’t help but recall a recent young girl who was ridiculed because of her speech about her grandfather. Kindness, fairness & tolerance is much needed in our world today.

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  7. Love this so much! Well said.

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