It seems to occur most often at meal times or early in the morning before the first coffee. "Robocalls" or the old name, telemarketers. With fewer people having land lines, such calls have proliferated. Scant reliance can be placed on the veracity of the name or source that is announced when the telephone rings. A call reportedly originating from "Duke Hospital" was someone peddling aluminum siding for the house. Very seldom do we pick up unless the caller is verified. If just one call gets a response, the traffic increases. But a sure bet to be ignored are those from NAME NOT PROVIDED.
When we do pick up and the caller is a ghost of the purported originator, the range of 'services' offered seems unlimited. Did you see the recent meme making the rounds . . . "On March 10, 1876, Alexander Graham Bell makes the first phone call ever and moments later he was notified that his car's extended warranty had expired." Frequently, we get messages on our answering machine that we have over drafted on a credit card (which we do not in fact own). Apparently, many folks are concerned that we are not receiving adequate Medicare benefits and if we give them our Social Security number, they will update our coverage. My wife who is quicker with a quip than I used her talent with a well timed response to a caller warning that our Windows computer needed repair: "Our windows are fine. Do you work on doors?" (Haven't had a Windows computer in years.)
Then, would you be heartless and ignore a call from a 'grand-son' in distress? An acquaintance was bilked of several hundred dollars when he responded to an "I'm in jail and need bail money" call. At least he has a grand-son old enough to face that circumstance. Not I, and when I got a "Hi, grand-dad" call from my "grand-son", the call abruptly ended when he couldn't answer "which grand-son?". Again, my wife's talent shone: "Hello, Grand-ma". Immediately, she replied, "Well, hello, dear. What do you need? Are you in jail or the hospital? Do you need me to send you a specified amount of gift cards? Is your girlfriend pregnant?" CLICK !!!
These callers seem to lack a sense of humor. The comedian, Carl Hurley, offered a humorous array of responses to these intruders. (Can probably find on YouTube.) Once upon a time, I decided to have a bit of fun with telemarketers. Like the solicitation for a donation to a 'Benevolent Fund' for law officers. "I can't donate" was my somber reply. "Why not?" My reply, "I'm a convicted felon" was followed by a long silence. "You're kidding?" he finally sputtered. "Yes; but I still will not contribute. Good-bye." Another 'robot' finished his spiel and I affected a child-like voice: "I'm so glad you called. There is a car parked outside with blue lights going blink, blink, blink and someone in a blue uniform is ringing my door bell. Should I be worried?" LOONNGGG silence. "Well, I don't know, sir." I: "You're just of no help at all !! Bye."
Beware of the 'Robots' but if one sneaks through, have a little fun.
Ron, when my phone rings with one of those unidentified numbers or one I don't recognize, I can hardly wait to answer. My answer starts "Department of Fraud Investigation, Bynum Division. How may I direct your call." It can be a lot of fun. So proud of your spouse. If you would send me your telephone number and Social Security number, I would be glad to share them as well. Corkey
ReplyDeleteGreat suggestions, Ron and Corkey. May as well have a little fund now that "do not call" has evaporated through a misty vapor.
ReplyDeleteDoes "L" work as an answering service? Would love to replay her answers at future party!!!!
ReplyDeleteRon, delightful. Put me in mind of a call I got in Greensboro some years back: "Sir, wouldn't you feel safer knowing your family was protected at home from invasive crime and violence?" "Well, this isn't really my home." "But knowing all the risks, wouldn't you feel safer, sir, knowing your doors and windows were secured?" "OK, in all candor, you are going to have to call back. I'm robbing this place right now." Click.
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