DO YOU SPEAK 'TEKKY' ?

   Over the years, I have had something of an amateur-like fascination with languages.  Used my high school  French as entree into a college minor in French. And  I even taught French I and II at the high school level for a couple of years. In graduate school, I learned enough Spanish to pass an open-dictionary test to satisfy the language requirement.  I had already more than met my linguistic match with Koine Greek while in seminary at Duke , having made a kind of 'bargain' with the Holy  One: get me out with a 'gentleman's C' and Iwill never tempt You like this again.

    Now, some 56 years later, I am slowly learning German via an internet app. Already, I knew a few essential phrases such as 'Ich habe hunger' = I'm hungry.  While I will never have the felicity with the language that my son-in-law has, 'progress' is occurring  enough that I am enjoying the challenge.

     But it is a language not specific to any geographic region that I am finding most daunting... it's the vocabulary of electronic technology.

     It all began in a rather mundane manner.  We had decided to move into another level of 'tekkydom'.  The price for the item was 'right' ; but when the technician came to install, we learned that our current internet modem did not have enough gig speed to transmit the signal.  A call to  the provider revealed that they were unable to ( what else ?) provide sufficient speed to meet our need.  So, I used my search engine to find another provider  to 
upgrade the service, including the retention of our land line number.

    The technician who came today was patient, thorough and in all ways, knowledgeable.  When he left, the internet, the modem, television, and phone lines were all operational.  We did learn, however, that one tv channel for which  we had received assurance would be available is not ! In the meantime, the low charge that was on batteries expired and they have just now been brought back to full capacity.  

   Soon after his departure, the telephone service played 'hide and seek'.  We could call out but for incoming calls, there were rings but no  connectivity.

     Keeping our fingers crossed that  the signal for the internet service  continues to work.  When  we press the power button on the tv remote, a blue light comes on at the cable box ... but noting else happens.  Yet another call to tech support and the promise that they had an open order for someone to come back.  It is now after 8 pm. and no one has come.

    Many times over the past few years, I have expressed my lack of knowledge in the field of computers by writing 'ain't tekknolodgie wunnerful !'.

   With today's aggravations, I seem to be remembering language whose use in my youth would have incurred parental reprimand.
From a former intern I learned a very useful computer method  for expressing the condition:  "Beetle Bailey cuss-words", such as 
^%$&((#@$#&))@@!!##.
    
    Satchel