Thursday, January 31, 2013
More Than 'patch,patch,patch'
Within a two day period last week, I had appointments with my dentist, optometrist, and audiologist. Nothing major, unless having a new molar crown counts as major. A routine check to determine if my glasses are strong enough and to have the little 'computers' in my tiny hearing aids refurbished. Soon it will be time to schedule my annual consultations with the PCP, cardiologist, and urologist.
Overall, I am healthy and I am grateful. My two younger brothers --71 and soon 65--have wondered how I, the oldest at almost 75, have avoided the menu of orthopedic hardware they each 'wear'.
They are not impressed by my answer of 'clean living'.
I'm uncertain but I think it was the venerable Art Linkletter (and if you wonder who he was, go ask someone with grey hair, or no hair) who said that after 55, everything is "patch, patch, patch". He did say (write) that "old age is not for sissies".
Stereotypes abound about 'old people', many of them unkind, derisive, and even mean-spirited. One is that an old person's 'best friend' is their bodily ailments and anyone within hearing distance (with or without hearing aids) can get a complete medical history and introduction to this 'friend'. As a teen, I knew not to ask Lois how she was because 15 minutes I would still be getting the details. [I promise never to write again about my 'doctor visits.]
Another is that most older adults live in some type of 'nursing home' (by whatever euphemistic label). Actually, the percentage is rather low. Many of 'us' continue to live 'independently' and enjoy a wide range of social, professional, spiritual, mental involvement in life. (None of this is meant to disparage the reality that such a facility is a necessity for many persons; our mother was one such .)
One of my heroes and models on how to 'age' with grace and dignity was Mr. Ralph Riddle who died a couple of years ago at 99+. Always the epitome of kindness, alertness, engagement, good humor, courtesy, immaculate grooming (the list can go on), it was a delight to be in his presence. He was the oldest of many siblings. His father and my maternal grand-father (also the father of many children) were good friends. Ralph loved to tell the story of how his dad had said to my grand-father: "Grover, the Bible says that we are to be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth, but it didn't say we had to do it alone."
Without doubt, illness and diseases are not humorous ; nor are they the totality nor the essence of Aging. Not all of us are 'grumpy old men (or women)'. [let's be honest, many are] One ancient culture had an aphorism that "when an old person dies, it is like losing a library.'
One of my acquaintances said that his elderly father had friends across the age spectrum as a way of avoiding some of the loneliness potential that can come if all ones friends are in the same age cohort. I think that there is wisdom in that philosophy.
Maybe one key ingredient is mutual RESPECT.
Satchel
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AMEN!! I have always had friends older and younger than I. I've always thought that being with just your contemporaries is not particularly stimulating at all. Every generation has something to contribute to one's life.
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