"How Long, O Lord, How Long . . . "

LAMENT :  " a passionate expression of grief or sorrow"

Psalm 13 in the Hebrew Bible : "How long, O Lord? . . . How long must  I take counsel in my soul

  and have sorrow in my heart all the day ?

How long shall my enemies be exalted over me?"

   As you know, it has happened AGAIN !!  For the 245th time in the last 20 years according to a Facebook post by a woman named Eliza Kay Sparks . . . schools from Elementary and High Schools and colleges and universities !! And there have  been 27 school shootings thus far in 2022.

   And in American society at large, just today the Washington Post reports that already there have been Fourteen (14) mass shootings over Memorial Day week-end.

     Many times  the mantra has been trotted out that the best defense against a bad person with a gun is a good  person with a gun. How many idle 'good guns' were in the school in Uvalde while teachers and children were being killed?  It reflects the myth of  redemptive violence . . . guns will solve your problems.  ( the only probable exception being in self-defense in a shoot or be shot situation.) Death by firearms is rapidly becoming the Number One killer of American youth under the age of 20.

    What, then, can be done in this nation with the highest homicide rate, including school shootings, in the world ?  A complex matter, right? Wrong.  At least not for first steps . . . 

  ..reportedly 89% of Americans favor background checks to purchase weapons;

  .. laws to ban the sale of assault weapons in a civilian society;  

  ..an updated understanding of the purpose of the  Second Amendment ('A well-regulated militia doesn't kill school children.');

  .. holding accountable 'leaders' who apparently are more sensitive to the money of the gun lobby than to the protection  of teachers, school children and society at large.  They speak with all the sensitivity and empathy as buzzards devouring carrion.

   Tonight there are nineteen (19) Texas children dead who need not to be.  Mothers and Fathers are weeping for their children, lamenting their slaughter, echoing words attributed to the  Hebrew prophet, Jeremiah, :

   "Is it nothing to you, all you who  pass by?  Look and see if there is any sorrow like my sorrow. . ."  Please do not say something like 'God caused it to happen' or  'it was God's  plan'.  Jesus of Nazareth whom Christians believe spoke authoritatively about the Holy One said  "It is not the will of my Father in heaven that one of these little ones should be lost."

(Matthew 18:14).

    Indeed, O Lord, how long . . . .

       Satchel

   

    

"Kill the Ump ! "

 

   Home Plate: " a 17-inch square ...with two of the corners removed so the one edge is   17 inches long,   two adjacent sides are 8 1/2 inches each and the remaining two sides are 12 e=inches each and set at an angle to make a point"   an internet definition of dimensions of Major League home plate.

  

 Angel is behaving like his usual non-Angelic self.

Or so many professional baseball players and their fans are proclaiming loudly.  Angel Hernandez, a major league baseball umpire,  has long been   reviled as perhaps the worst umpire ever.  The season has barely begun and already he has made several controversial calls.  (If you find this an interesting topic, check YouTube's many entries for him.)

   Whatever the accuracies or inaccuracies of his calls, Hernandez joins a long list of 'men in blue' disliked by players and fans alike.  "Kill the ump!" is not considered a literal call for homicide, although in the early years of the sport, umpiring was considered so dangerous that some apparently carried weapons. Years ago, an elderly man told me that he and his brother regularly attended local minor league games primarily to heckle the officials.  Leo Durocher, one of the all-time leading umpire antagonists, claimed that he had "never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes.".

   Calling balls and strikes should be easy, right? But standing behind the catcher, judging the trajectory of a sphere traveling at a rapid rate of speed can be challenging at times.  And, the exact location of the strike zone frequently becomes a matter of  opinion. Bill Klem, a legendary umpire who was posthumously inducted in Baseball's Hall of Fame, claimed, "It ain't nothin' til I call it".  On another  occasion after he was shown a photograph of a blown call, he retorted, "Gentlemen, he was out  because I said he was out".

   From  my own basebal'career', I recall only once when I believed that I had received a 'bad call'.  Having missed the coach's 'steal' sign on the first pitch, I then missed that he had removed it and took off for second base.  Clearly safe,   I was furious that the local citizen drafted to call bases proclaimed me 'out'.

   In the 1970's, I often umpired high school age Recreation League games, receiving the hefty  pay (for the time) of $25 for a Saturday afternoon double header.  In an earlier post from  August 2018 ("Rabbit Ears"), I told of a spectator who regularly questioned the legitimacy of my birth until one day when I shamed  him into a subsequent apology.      

  Rather than tallying the count on my fingers or relying on memory, I carried a small clicker device that I would update with every pitch. However, during one game, I 'messed up' and said, "Strike Three" to which the young man protested that he had but two strikes.  "You're out", I said, and he quietly took his seat.  Reflecting later, I realized that he was correct.  Many years afterwards, I saw his name on the outside bulletin board as the Minister of a large United Methodist Church.  I wrote an email reminding him of the incident (which he had forgotten) and my long overdue  apology. 

  Then there was the game in which John hit a home run but failed to touch home plate. That is an  appeal call and the umpire can rule only if it is protested.  It was and I called him out.  Four or five years thereafter , he was a student in a Freshman History course that  I taught at the local college.

    One beautiful Saturday afternoon, after a break in the play, I looked up to see the pitcher ( a large boy) throw the ball full force into the heckling opponent's dugout. I promptly ejected him from the game.  When his coach asked if I might have been a bit severe, I noted that had the ball stuck someone in the head, the outcome could have been tragic.  Quite coincidentally, I was umpiring a game for the same team the following week.  When  I called  this same player out on strikes, he walked away about 10 feet before turning around to tell me "You are crazy !".  I replied, "I might be but you are out of this game."

   In recent years, we have attended local games of young athletes whom we know and with whom we have connection.  'Sportsmanship' or its absence, especially with the rancor expressed for the umpires, seems to have reached great depths.  Maybe it is part of the 'tradition' to 'rag the umpire' but civility and being role models for the kids have been severely wounded.  Last year I saw a sign with this message posted at a youth league field:

        "  REMINDERS FROM YOUR CHILD: 

.I'm a KID

.It's  just a GAME

.My Coach is a VOLUNTEER

.The Officials are HUMANS

.NO COLLEGE SCHOLARSHIPS WILL BE HANDED OUT TODAY.

    Thank you and have fun "

  I thank my cousin, Tom, who was once a professional pitcher for this timely reminder :

In the meantime, be another kind of 'angel' and don't 

'Kill the Ump !'

     

      Satchel

   

"If Winter comes, can Spring be far Behind ?"

 

   Spring is "springing".   The season keeps us alert to its capriciousness : clear blue skies and warming temps, then the next day, snow accumulates to 5 and 6 inches in the western part of the state.  At an  outdoor graduation ceremony one May, faculty and students  found that our academic paraphernalia failed to keep us warm.  So often the joys of Springtime are delayed by the mud and the muck.

   Do you remember the childhood rhyme "April showers bring May flowers" ? In our area, "May" came early with an extravaganza of colors.

   What do you call these yellow beauties?  Once named "Buttercups" now more often identified as "Jonquils" and "Daffodils" , they adorn  lawns, woodlands, and bare spots all over our region.  This year several varieties provided an array of  coloration. Now they are gone and the large oaks in the background have their early foliage.  Our automobile, usually a shade of blue, now carries a bright yellow hue. Can you say  "pollen"or "allergy" and "SNEEZE" !  

   The   oaks behind this Redbud contribute to the pollen but the pines usually are chief villains or contributors to the blooms, depending upon one's  sneeze frequency.

   Now the dogwoods, the azaleas, the forsythia, along with other vegetation have turned the landscape into a riot of color and beauty.  Just a few short weeks ago, this was the view:

   Spring means a returning to life from often-frozen, dreary places. Just as there is a Winter of the calendar of the seasons, there can be a 'Winter of the Soul' when life's necessities such as Hope, Renewal,New Life, etc. seem to be hiding or even 'missing in action'.   For Christians (of many 'varieties') Easter's observation in Spring bespeaks the Resurrection of Jesus.

Today I bought a volume of the late Mary Oliver's poems and this snippet from "Whistling Swans" summarizes what many are longing for in this time of many fears, hurts, wars, biases:

   "Rumi said, There is no proof of the soul.  

     But isn't the return of spring and how it

     springs up in our  hearts a pretty good hint   ?

          (Mary  Oliver, "Whistling Swans" in Devotions: The Collected Poems of Mary Oliver, page 6)

          Satchel

WHISTLING WOMEN . . .

 

  Can you whistle ?  It is a skill in which i have limited ability, especially if it is "musical".  Do you know any 'whistling' sayings ? Gloria Freeland, a retired journalism professor in Kansas, writes a weekly column, Kansas Snapshots (www.kansassnapshots.com).  This week's offering, "Just Put Your Lips Together", noted several sayings about the art of  whistling  that have become commonplace in our lingo. . .  among them "Whistling past the cemetery", "whistling in the dark", "Whistle stop" towns, etc. 

  Then there is another expression, erroneously said to be Biblical in origin, whose "message" is demeaning and worse to women: "a whistling woman and a crowing hen are neither fit for God nor man".  That British version morphed into the equally offensive American version "a whistling woman and a crowing hen never come to a very good end".

  So, what is the deal about a 'crowing hen"?

  A  hen crows to establish her place in the pecking order to establish her dominance and territory . . . like a rooster.  In effect, to claim equality with the male. The expression, not so subtle, however, tells the female to "BE SILENT", in other words, don't 'whistle', stay 'in your second class place'.

  Have you heard this riddle, still confounding to many but hopefully fewer than not so long ago? In a surgical unit where a young man has been  brought for emergency surgery, the surgeon exclaimed "I cannot perform this operation; this is my son !" The young man is the surgeon's son but the surgeon is not the lad's father." 'How can this be ?' has stumped many who could not  fathom the reality of a woman surgeon

  Historic and contemporary manifestations of the inequality are everywhere in our society. President Jimmy Carter instituted Women's History Month as 'a national recognition of the vital role women have played throughout history" (re an online site).  

   This past week Judge Katanji Brown Jackson endured shameful questioning and behavior from members of the Senate Judiciary Committee.  While there have been and are  female Supreme Court Justices, the first one was Sandra Day O'Connor who was appointed by President Reagan in 1981 (!) .  Judge Jackson's  treatment was doubly scandalous, being a Black woman.  Yeah, I know that there was a LOT of partisan political posturing going on (primarily, but not exclusively by males) but as Joseph Welch asked Senator McCarthy in 1954' "Have you no sense of decency, sir?". 

      Judge Jackson is more than "qualified" to "whistle". She already belongs in the "Choir" of some outstanding  "whistlers", including just a few of the names in the news recently:  Madeleine Albright, Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Maya Angelou, Billy Jean King, Mary the Mother  of Jesus, and they are joined by untold numbers of sisters who know the spirit of Helen Reddy's song "I am Woman" when she sang, "[I've] a long way to go until my brother understands."

     Satchel

   

       

"Everything's the same now that it's changed . . ."

  "It's hard to maintain a consistent world view when the world itself is always changing . . . " Rachel Held Evans wrote that in Faith Unraveled.  She died on May 4, 2019, at the age of thirty-seven, having written extensively about her journey from a staunchly conservative evangelical to an Episcopal 'liberal'.  Beyond any religious framing, Bob Dylan had foretold impermanence in his iconic "The times they are a'changing".  By contrast, there is the aphorism, "Plus ca change, plus ca dure". If my French is correct, that translates somewhat like, "The more things change, the more they stay the same".  

   Post-World War II rulers in the Soviet Union and now Russia have intervened to impose their hegemony (sometimes through the Communist  party of various countries) in Hungary, Czechoslovakia (1948 and 1968), Crimea, and now Ukraine. This latest violence marks an assault on an independent, autonomous country, raising international anxiety to its highest level since perhaps the Cuban Missile Crisis. 

   Few persons would now likely profess the optimism found in  the self (and perhaps by extension, societal) assertion that "in every day in every way, I'm getting better and better".  Yet, some among us thought, believed, hoped that barbarism was at least receding.  Accountability is missing in much human behavior.  The outcome of the fighting in Ukraine likely will have sooner and later implications.

  In the meantime, compassion has frequently been a response to human suffering.  While there are scammers roaming around in times of turmoil, many legitimate  organizations and groups are attempting to respond to the toll of human anguish in Ukraine.  If you would like a suggestion , the United Methodist Committee On Relief provides humanitarian assistance to the Ukrainian people in the wake of the Russian invasion of their country.  One hundred percent (100%)  of contributions go to direct assistance to Ukranians.  According to their official site, gifts to support  relief can be made in either of these ways:

   .Online at  https://umcmission.org/advance-project/982450  

    .Toll free telephone : 888-252-6174

    .By check with "Advance # 982450-Ukraine" written on the meme line and mailed to   Global Ministries/UMCOR, GPO, PO Box9068, New York, NY 10087-9068

    Be generous !

              Satchel

 

   

Benjucho

  "Old" as "long time" and not necessarily "aged"


Sometimes, however, the terms may very well be synonymous.

     Last week my telephone buzzed with an heretofore unknown (to me) function . . . using something called "Messenger", it is possible to have a face to face virtual chat with someone.  So, unaware of that option, I missed the first couple of incoming calls from my friend of many years, Ben aka  Benjucho.

    In the late 1950's, he had traveled from his home in LaPaz, Bolivia, to the North Carolina college where we met during his sophomore year.

Within a short time, we became friends and he often went with me on week-end visits to my parents' home and he became their fourth "son".

   While an undergrad, Ben played on the school's varsity tennis team.

He and his roommate, Gary, lived in a gym dorm room in exchange for minor custodial tasks there. Ben provided 'half-time entertainment' as he pushed the big mop across the basketball court.  Much of the 'social life' and activities on campus emanated from the ten "Greek" organizations---six national fraternities and four sororities.  Ben and I became members of different groups, but our friendship remained strong.

   Memories of three of his visits to our home remain vivid. I will tell the most personally painful one first and save 'the best for last'. Somehow in my misguided youth I had become a fan of  Duke University athletic teams. My dad, two brothers and Ben were strong supporters of UNC football.  On Thanksgiving Day, November 21, 1959, before a nationally televised audience, Duke on their home field was the heavy favorite, having defeated the UNC team in 8 of the 9 preceding games.  In our house pre-game there was good-natured banter about possible outcomes.  After Carolina scored on their first three possessions things went downhill quickly for Duke. Then UNC returned the opening kick-off of the second half for a 93 yard touchdown run.  Duke eventually lost 50-0 !  I do not remember  details of  our subsequent conversation but I was definitely outnumbered.

   One Saturday after his enrollment in a PhD program  in Chapel Hill, he came walking up my parents' driveway, having hitchhiked a ride there.  He had planned a surprise visit to show us his new Volkswagen but, unfortunately, he had a single car mishap en route.  After determining the he had no injuries, dad drove him to the accident scene.

In time, he acquired another automobile but that was a day of 'might have beens'.

  During undergraduate years, Ben's dad, a Bolivian Methodist minister, visited from LaPaz and my parents hosted them in their home for part of that time.  Speaking no English and our being able to use only a few Spanish words, he relied on his son  for translation .  The local newspaper editor interviewed him and that was "front page news " in our little town. Dad  drove us throughout the area, visiting UNC and Duke, touring the State capitol and other places that interested our visitor.  And mom prepared several dishes of 'Southern cuisine'; however, I remember his being less than enthusiastic about the fried frog legs.

   After earning his PhD in biochemistry, Ben completed his training to be a physician.  After many years in practice, he retired and moved close to his adult children, first in Florida and now in California.His  parents and  siblings who lived in Bolivia are now deceased; however, over the years, he periodically visited them there.

Ben on one his trips to Bolivia

In those intervening 60+ years since his graduation, we have seen each other intermittently.  The conversation always flows easily between 'reminiscing' and the 'right now'. My life has been enriched by his friendship.

There is a reminder that "it takes a long time to make old friends".

A favorite book is Dear  Old Man: Letters to Myself on Growing Old by Dr. Charles Wells.  Regarding friendships, he wrote that aside from good health and family, "friendships are probably the most valuable assets a person can take into old age. . . . I now believe that friendships attain their full richness only in old age ." (page 102)

Here's to you, Dugger !

Satchel

"What's it all about ? "

What do these quotes have in common ?;

   "It was a dark and stormy night"  (Snoopy, et al)

     "In the beginning . . . "  (Genesis)

         "Life is difficult "  (Peck, The Road Less Travelled)

            "Marley was dead" (Dickens, A Christmas Carol)

                "Elmer Gantry was drunk" (Lewis, Elmer Gantry)

                   "I wear the ring" (Conroy, Lords of Discipline)

     If you recognized some or all of these as the first lines of literature, give credit to whomever fostered in you a love of reading.  Coming up with an 'catchy' opening phrase or sentence can be the largest obstacle in writing.  Somewhere in one of Albert Camus's novels he told of a person who labored for thirty years to have the perfect opening line for his Magnum Opus.

   Before his indiscretions came to light, Bill Cosby was a well-known and quoted comedian, adept at one-liners and memorable titles. A memoir of sorts he called I Started Out as a Child. Sounds like a perfect descriptor.

   Were you to write the story of your life, what would you choose to title it and what would be the introductory sentence? Particularly, if you want it to point towards a kind of summary statement of "what it has all been about".

  The late psychologist, Erik Erikson, birthed the concept of life stages and various "tasks" to be addressed in each.  For those 65 and older, he considered the dichotomy to be "Integrity versus Despair". One consequence of his model has been a use of writing one's  life review which differs from reminiscing.  Whether the   process follows a chronological or topical format, one article described the outcome as an affirmation that "one's life has been well-lived, makes sense, and brings a sense of peace and satisfaction". (Intriago, "How a Life Review comforts the  elderly and prevents late life depression", Seniors Matter,  May 4, 2021). Whether or not such a perspective of meaning, purpose and integration of one's values is resolved can make the difference between late-life Integrity or Despair.

   Bearing down hard on my 84th birthday and possessing a reasonable memory, I have been attracted to the idea of writing my own life review... whether for progeny or for my own understandings.  And, I hope to attach an addendum in a dozen or so years from now !

   Several years ago, at the counseling center where I practice,  I led a group of older  persons on  such a journey. Unanimously, they expressed benefit from the experience.  (If such an undertaking interests you, assistance abounds via computer search and books.)

   Now, reminiscing can be pleasurable . Just today, after I had emailed my daughter a couple of clips from a television program we had enjoyed in her youth, she asked if I were "going down tv memory lane ?". Well, maybe strolls along that route can provide specifics of our lives, life review can come closer to providing personal insights posed in Hal David and Bert Bacharach's song, What's it All About, Alfie ?

   For my title, I think I will copy that of the late Grady Nutt ... So Good, So Far.  Still trying to find that just right first sentence, though.

     Satchel

"Two Faced"

 

      To call someone"two-faced" ranks high in the handbook of insults.  Among other things, it designates the person or thing as being   duplicitous, deceitful, and not to be trusted.  And, for most of the human race, there is often a gap between the person we prefer to be perceived as and the other side . . . maybe what Dr. Karl Jung called our  "shadow".  Perhaps the 'saving feature' is that it is usually not malicious... and more often motivated by a fear or anxiety about some insecurity. But, as the cliche has it, I digress.

   The  image above is of the Roman god, Janus.  He the keeper of  doors, of transitions, of looking both to the past and to the future. And, of course, our month  January is its namesake. Good old January !! Here in our state, the weather has had difficulty deciding the appropriate season.  On Sunday, January 2, local temperatures hovered around 70*. We even ran the air-conditioner. Next day the temperature had dropped and we had a couple of hours of heavy snowfall which accumulated; then two or three hours later . .  . gone like  Frosty the Snowman !  The top picture was taken at 10:57 a.m. on January 4, 2022; the bottom taken at 3:11 p.m. on the same day.  Talk about being "two faced"!

     

    Janus carries at least two interpretations: first, a keeper of doors . . . past and future, of being in a place  to  gaze at the past while anticipating the future . . . turning points, transitions. Secondly, deliberately 'talking out of both sides' of one's mouth  When the latter prevails, well, the past, present and the future are susceptible to many distortions and misuses . . .  dependent upon one's agenda and motives

   Opinions vary as to who  coined the phrase: " The future ain't what it used to be." That one is attributed to Yogi Berra. A more 'sophisticated' version : "The trouble with our times is that the future is not what it used to be" originated with French philosopher Paul Valery. Regardless of who first wrote/said that and with 

whatever degree of grammatical correctness, examples abound of deliberately misusing (o.k.., lying about) the past and what that portends for the future.  When those distortions  occur,  "two faced" does not capture the cynicism of current  day 'Janus-es'.  

  "The times, they are a'changing".  May 'Janus' possess the clarity of vision and integrity to guide us through these transitional times.

    Satchel

    

  

   

  

"We are BETTER than you" . . .

                                                                      SNOB

                                                      

   . . . Or, more IMPORTANT, or SMARTER, or WEALTHIER, or . . .   The  implications are always the same --- something like: "  We are more God-Blessed, than you" or, "We are more entitled . . ." or other insults intended to "put you in your place" (and it is not where WE are).  Words like snob and  elitist describe such rude and disrespectful behavior.  For many humans,  such is an all too common 'put down' whether due to gender, race, national origin, socio-economic, religious, political, occupational, etc. factors.  Has it ever happened to you ? 

   Here is a kind of litmus test: Do we speak  to, acknowledge, converse with  persons  in service professions such as (but not a full listing) service persons such as restaurant wait-staff, check-out people and baggers at the grocery, house-keeping staff in places such as hotels and schools, sanitation workers.  Such people often seem to 'blend into the wood-work'.

    In the 1970's, Haverford College President  John Coleman took a short sabbatical during which he worked in a succession of 'blue collar' jobs.  He wrote  Blue Collar Journal telling about his experiences in three jobs.  The last one was as a sanitation worker in College Park , Maryland.  He wrote of picking up garbage  while people were  going about life's routines and never "seeing" or acknowledging him and the suburbanite who  castigated him for  refusing to move her trash  can filled with cinderblocks.

   Recently after we checked in to a facility for a vacation, my wife was making adjustments to our unit door with a cloth towel.  When a couple in the adjoining  room were exiting their room, she greeted them  with a sincere "Hello" only to be met with a  supercilious sneer and no words.  Somewhat like what the old timers called 'looking down your nose' at someone . Perhaps they assumed that she was part of the housekeeping staff and thereby unworthy of a courteous reply.

   Her reaction was to be amazed, shocked and somewhat incredulous by such blatant rudeness.  How would you have responded?

         Satchel

  

HOW DO "THEY" DO "THAT" ?

 

                                                        "MUSE, SAY SOMETHING'

     The They are my younger brother and Sean Dietrich (aka Sean of the South).  Both are writers --columnists -- who have been doing That for many days, weeks, years.  I.e., turning out daily and/or weekly columns.  WHERE do they (as well as all the other bloggers, columnists, scribblers, journalist such as the woman in Kansas who sends me her weekly blog) find the ideas, topics upon which to expound, asks he who often finds the "let's write about ________" bank overdrawn.

   And, I must confess, that I have on occasion accused my brother of kissing the Blarney Stone. The 'gift of gab' comes readily and easily for him. And, reading Sean's posts and occasionally listening to his podcasts,  I suspect the same of him. 

   And, it is mostly pretty good stuff with a 'point'.  Unlike what his Preaching Professor at Duke Divinity School told a long-ago fraternity brother who had just completed a course assignment : "Bob, you say nothing very well".  Have you ever heard the dismissive term "That's bunk" or "bunkum" ?  It's a reference to a Congressional filibuster speech long ago by a North Carolina Congressman extolling ad nauseam the virtues of his home county, Buncombe. One source said that Bunkum has been American slang for "nonsense" for almost two  centuries.

   Like some of my sermon re-runs from another life, occasionally one of my brother's  columns has a slight whiff of prior use. Usually their compositions tell stories (not to be equated with lies).   Ernest Hemingway was asked long after  his literary success why he continued to write.  He answered something to the effect that he knew a lot of good stories and wanted to tell them.  About a 180* distance from what a prominent minister told me about his need for a vacation: "I had reached the point where  I had nothing to say and no great desire to say it."

   I tell myself that the primary reason the muse is often quiet is because I have professional responsibilities that preclude the leisure that seems to be my prerequisite for creativity.  Still, staring at a daily dead-line reminds me of the preacher struggling  on Saturday night to have a sermon topic who opens his Sacred Scripture and pleads, "Say something  "

   Do you have any topic suggestions to pass along . . whether it's something that matters or it's just a story?

     Satchel

"IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING . . .

 

  . . . YOU WILL PROBABLY END UP SOMEWHERE ELSE" .  So wrote Dr. David Campbell in his 1974 pop-psychology book.   Lewis Carroll (he of Alice in Wonderland) made a similar observation with "if you don't know where you are  going, any road will get you there."

   Allegedly, males do not ask for directions even when hopelessly 'disoriented'.  I found the above card in a stationery shop in California . . . all the way across the continental U.S. from our home.  The irony is that  the directional sign points to two towns in our county with state road numbers.  It might  be 'fun' to free associate and imagine a story that describes what is going on in that picture.

    Unless our intention is simply to "ramble", having a destination is assumed in our travels.  Parallels ? Some might say that such is a metaphor for the 'journey' called LIFE.   Many books, gurus, therapists, motivational speakers, etc. proclaim the importance of GOALS ( read, 'destinations') if one is to live a happy, fulfilling, 'successful' life. 

   I am beginning to think that  too rigid an adherence to goals we set at one stage of life may no longer fit at another stage.  In my office,  I have  a pair of bookends featuring my baby shoes embronzed. (Such was the tradition for many of my parents' contemporaries.)  When a client's early goals no longer fit their current situation, I put those shoes alongside those I am wearing to suggest  ways that life changes and we grow. Most folks in Western society wear shoes but sizes change.

    What is the alternative to drift ?  I would nominate things such as 'guiding principles', resiliency, and  growth. Occasionally, we encounter 'detours', reorientations, 'redirecting' on the trip.  Several years ago, I and several colleagues were 'downsized'  ostensibly for budget reasons by the college where I was a tenured professor. In time I reached an out of court settlement with the school for their violation of personnel policies. Fast forward five years . . . in a pro forma interview for the second part of a clinical program, I was asked, "What are your goals for five years from now?".  The words virtually spoke themselves: "Five years ago, I could not have seen myself here today. I have learned to plan as much as possible, put myself in favorable positions, and trust the remainder to Divine  Providence."  Unplanned alliteration.

   For sure, I have had several periods of drift; still, I am grateful that the overall trajectory has been consistent.  The late Grady Nutt titled his memoir So Good So Far.  I still don't know the details of the 'next steps'.  How about you ? 

    Satchel

   

   

   

        

PARABLE OF THE WATERBED . . . or. . . Check your sources

 

                         

                                   "Don't believe everything that you read on the Internet. "

                                                                 Abraham Lincoln

         Do you trust your sources?  What makes them dependable and what arouses your skepticism ? 

   Will Rogers, an American 'philosopher' of home-spun wit and wisdom, reportedly said, "All I know is just what I read in the papers" which is usually quoted without the other part of the sentence:". . . and that's an alibi for my ignorance." Today, he likely would be quizzed about which newspaper (or television network) he prefers.

   How do we know that what we hear is true, accurate and in good faith and what is concocted with no authenticity, perhaps to manipulate one's ignorance (or, if you prefer, one's not knowing) ?

  A parable is "a short story which teaches a moral or spiritual message."  Our friend Julie has multiple talents, especially her musical skills.  We came to know her when I was minister of a near-by church and it soon became obvious that she is a keen observer of human nature and possesses a sharp wit and subtle sense of humor.  Last week she posted what I call The Parable of the Waterbed and it is copied here with her approval:  (Sorry about the small type; my tekkie skills are limited. It is worth the read.)

   Maybe we need more George Washington 's

who cannot tell a lie or so he reportedly said.

  

    Satchel

                                   

"IF A BULLFROG HAD WINGS , , , "

" . . . he wouldn't bump his tail on the ground !"   

Or, so a wise man  often told me as I was growing up.  (And, have you noticed that a "wise man" differs greatly from a  "wise guy" ?)  The 'wise man' in this case was my dad, Frank.  And that was just one  among many of the wise aphorisms he  passed on to his sons.  After his death, I complied a list of "Frank-ism's" to share with  our extended family.

    Theses are among the more memorable of his 'sayings':

  . "You aren't going to learn any younger son." [When we would protest that we  didn't know how to do a task.]

  ."The world doesnot revolve around you."

  ."Don't wish your time away son."

  ."Boy, you ask more questions that a Philadelphia lawyer."

    But the one above seems to have more applicability these days and  not just in our family where it has been passed on to the next generations.

My daughter who began painting whimsical chicks as a way to raise funds for cancer research and patients sent me the  above 'frog' as a Father's  Day gift.  As she explained it in her 'Chicks4aCause' page, dad's wise words live on:

One of my brothers remembered that mom expressed a similar sentiment: " 'if' is  the biggest little word in the English language."

   Several years ago, a client provided yet another similar sentiment while describing how his life might have been different "if". . .  "If 'if's' and but's were candy and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas."

   Someone claimed that  "if" expresses "forlorn regret" and another that it speaks of  unrealistic wish for better circumstances,  connections ,wealth,  wanting things different  and more advantageous.  I think Rudyard Kipling, one-time Poet Laureate of England, pointed to a loftier understanding, an ideal of dignity in a world of contentiousness.  His poem is a bit lengthy to include here but it is worth a read. "If" one overcomes several life challenges with dignity, then " you'll be a Man,  my son  !"  More inclusive understandings would say something like "you'll be a mature Adult, my friend".

  

     Sounds like a "Frank-ism" to me .

        Satchel