SHAME TO THE VICTIMS . . .

       A sorry display of intolerance was there for the entire world to see.  Yesterday's Senate Judiciary Committee hearings regarding the nomination of Brett Kavanaugh for the US Supreme Court blatantly revealed many things that are amiss within American society and politics, especially the reflexive practice of disparaging female victims of sexual assault.

     Questions abound . Why have victims of sexual abuse typically been reluctant to speak out about what has happened to them?  Why have so many in power , typically  but not exclusively white males, been either dismissive of their claims or downright condemnatory?  And why would someone wait many years after an assault to report such and how reliable can those memories be?

   To the first question, several responses have been offered: not being believed (even Dr. Freud could not/would not believe his early patients' stories of incest.); fear of further harm; being shamed with innuendos about one's own 'morality'.

   Why not believed or acknowledged?  There is the myth that 'nice guys' would not do that. Underneath is the ugly fact of misogyny ... "dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women".

    As for the accuracy and persistence of traumatic memories ... Not many years ago, a since discredited practice of Recovered Memory Syndrome caused all kinds of havoc, relationally and legally.  These 'memories' were typically considered to have been generated by outside influences and were not actual occurrences. 

    Memory is not always an accurate instrument.  Having acknowledged that does not discount the validity of repressed memories being stored in the brain and impacting one's subsequent life.  Allow me to write from experiences that have occurred in my therapy office over years.

    I began my training as a psychotherapist in 1990 and have subsequently practiced in various capacities within one of the major medical centers in our region.
Within the past ten years, I became aware of and trained in 'Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing', specifically for the treatment of traumas of various types.  (for further details, put your search engine on "E.C. Hurley,Jr" and follow any links suggested.)  Someone said that proof of the validity of EMDR as a mode of therapy is that Blue Cross and the VA reimburse for it.

     The earliest victim of sexual assault was referred to me by a colleague.  The 50+ year old Caucasian female had presented with issues of depression, subsequently attributed to her sexual PTSD.  Following adherence to the protocols of treatment, she revealed that as a 13 year old (40 or so years earlier) , she had been repeatedly assaulted by her father and one of his friends. After several sessions, she came in and said, "I'm ok !"  "Let's talk", I suggested.  At the end of the hour, I recommended a two week interval before our next meeting.  At that time , "I'm ok." and I responded as before.  Then I recommended a three week interval.  Same presentation.  I referred her back to her original therapist and she reported her depression gone there were no more intrusive memories.

   Since that client, I have seen many persons healed of their traumas whether originated in military experiences, in law enforcement, in automobile mishaps, and obviously, sexual abuse.

    Without attempting to explain the many nuances of neurological functioning (of which I am incapable),
it has been observed that EMDR does not remove the memory of the experience but removes the reliving of that.

    This is already a long post so I will not multiply examples.  From these, however, I know how wrong and and how hurtful it is to 'blame the victim' and her memories.  Perhaps it is apropos to note a recent meme that claimed there has been no condemnation of victims of priestly pedophilia from 35 years ago, particularly since the victims were young boys !

   Ron Wachs aka Satchel